Outlaw
by EDD17SP
Summary: Ferb Fletcher is a quiet but intimidating cowboy biker in Arizona, but he turns into an outlaw when he meets Vanessa, a dancer at a dusty old bar. Based on the song "Bullets in the Gun" by Toby Keith.
1. Chapter 1

Outlaw

**I've been toying around with the idea for a Phineabella story based on ****_Bullets in the Gun_**** for a while, but it just didn't seem to work. I think Phineas and Isabella are just too good and…law-abiding…to work. Plus, I really can't see Isabella as a scantily clad dancer in some bar. But Vanessa totally works because, while she says she's not evil, she is a bit of a rebel. Ferb isn't an outlaw either, but he works with pretty much any personality you give him as long as he doesn't talk much, and because of the way the show portrays his head-over-heels (figuratively) love for Vanessa, he'll pretty much do anything she wants.**

**So, yeah, I think this works fairly well.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Phineas and Ferb.**

**This is AU where Ferb has never met Vanessa or any of the other characters aside from his immediate family before. **

Chapter 1

_I had a reputation for never staying very long_

_Just like a wild and restless drifter…like a cowboy in a song_

The feeling of the open road. There's nothing like it, especially when the road is truly _open_, not clogged with other cars.

_It's perfect. _

That was the only thing on Ferb Fletcher's mind. Cruising down the road on his muted-red and black Harley-Davidson SPORTSTER 1200 CUSTOM, wind blowing through his green hair because he was too cool for a helmet, all was right with the world. The two lane highway was deserted. He'd passed a 1970 Ford Mustang going the opposite direction around noon and that was the only vehicle that he'd seen all day. The sun was halfway down the sky, so the air was cool, and the only sound was the steady growl of the Harley's engine.

Ferb rode around from town to town with no real goal other than to see what there was to see. Everything Ferb had to his name he kept in a saddle bag he had modified to fit the rear seat of his bike. He slept in motels at night and was on the road again the next morning, drifting from town to town with no destination and no real idea where he was going. It was a very simple life, but he loved it.

Ferb had no companions and hadn't seen his family in years. He had bought the bike and started aimlessly riding around the country several years ago, trying to find his purpose in life, not intending to separate himself from the world. But, as he aimlessly rode around the United States, Ferb began to embrace the life of a loner. Taking up drinking and adopting a pair of aviator sunglasses and a leather jacket and growing a stubbly beard, girls began to see him as mysterious. He picked up a confident walk which, combined with his usual stoic look and silence just screamed, "I am badass." The women swarmed, and that's when Ferb discovered the best part of being a free-drifting bachelor: the one night stand.

One day in Arkansas, Ferb had a frank misunderstanding of opinion with a drunken trucker and ended up in an intense bar fight. He escaped mostly unhurt, but decided it was time to add one more accessory to his tough-guy appearance. So, he found a little gun shop and bought an old .44 Colt. Sure, he could have bought a newer gun, but the old revolver just seemed to better fit his style. The only time he'd ever even fired it was when the store owner let him test it out, but it didn't matter. Having dead-eye aim was just one of Ferb's limitless talents.

And so, packing heat and enjoying the American Southwest, Ferb cruised through Arizona on the empty highway.

He glanced at the watch on his wrist. It was quarter to five, and Ferb was getting hungry. As it just so happened, a road sign announced an approaching exit a mile further ahead. Ferb had skipped lunch that day in favor of more riding, so he headed down the exit ramp without a second thought.

Finding a little saloon, Ferb parked his motorcycle. He glanced up at the sign, which read simply, "Buford's Place." Pushing open the doors, he found himself in a very drab bar. Little or no decoration enhanced the rickety wood floor and knotty walls and a thick layer of dust, probably from the desert sand, covered nearly everything. The only things in the building besides the tables and chairs and the bar was an aging jukebox and a little stage, lit by spotlights in the ceiling. A few derelict-looking bikers and truckers sat at the tables looking bored and swilling around their glasses of rum and bourbon.

Ferb walked up to the bar, his eyes narrow behind his sunglasses, and simply pointed to a bottle of whiskey on the top shelf. The bartender raised an skeptical eyebrow. Ferb extracted a few bills from his wallet and slapped them down on the bar. The bartender still looked suspicious, but snatched up the bills before grabbing the bottle and pouring a shot.

Ferb retreated to a table in the corner near the stage. Three shots later, music suddenly began to blast from unseen speakers. The bartender grabbed a microphone and spoke with little excitement, since there weren't many people to impress. "Alright, if I could direct your attention to the stage, I'd like to introduce your entertainment for the evening: the Lovely Desert Wind." Ferb blinked and looked around the bar. His eyes actually widened at what he saw. Walking toward him was without a doubt the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

She was nearly as tall as Ferb, which was impressive because Ferb was fairly tall himself. Her deep chestnut hair was long, flowing, and, Ferb could imagine, soft. In fact, the way her body curved, her entire figure could be described as "flowing." She dressed in a pair of extremely short cutoff jeans and a rather skimpy black bikini top, and high cowboy boots. But the thing that really captivated Ferb was her face. It was friendly, sweet, but she had a captivating, burning look in her blue eyes that gave away a wild side.

As she swayed toward the stage, Ferb thought he could actually see her sigh. She grabbed an untouched shot from one of the tables she passed and threw it back in one swift motion. The trucker she'd mooched it from said nothing. He just grinned at her smugly with a mouth full of cracked teeth. She paid no attention to him and continued walking.

The woman sashayed her way up the short stairs to the stage and began to dance. Sure, her dance was a show, supposed to be sexy, but though the movements flaunted her body, every motion was just as graceful and fluid as a ballerina. And Ferb was captivated.

When the performance ended, the bar patrons clapped, but six people applauding is hardly a standing ovation. Ferb jumped up from the table and fished a quarter from his pocket, heading for the jukebox.

She turned her head as the sound of an old, slow Johnny Cash song floated from the corner, a stark contrast to the fast, loud, Mexican salsa music she had just danced to. What she found was a rather mysterious but handsome man leaning against the jukebox, staring bleakly at her from behind mirrored sunglasses. She slowly walked toward him, no longer swinging her hips.

Through years of practice, Ferb had learned the trick to enticing a woman. All he had to do was stare at the girl he desired. Once she was enchanted by his tough, cryptic appearance and constant gaze and curiosity drew her closer, he'd deal the final blow. The one thing that would make them putty in his hands.

So when the dancing girl stopped in front of him, Ferb set the hook. He smiled. It was only a half smile, just enough, and sort of sly.

And boy did it work.

She practically dove forward and crashed her lips against his.

_Bingo._

_I met a dark haired beauty where the lay the whiskey down_

_In southern Arizona in a little boarder town_

**I know this chapter is rather short, but the next chapter should be longer because more stuff happens and there will actually be some dialogue.**

**Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay! After a weekend of camping and no fanfiction, I'm finally back!**

**Yet again, I find myself writing a story that I thought would be really good and the more I write, the more I think, "This was a dumb idea for a story." Either way, still gonna finish it.**

Chapter 2

_She's sittin' on my lap, we still had shots to kill_

_When a man pulled up who owned the bar in a Cadillac De Ville_

They sat at Ferb's table, she on his lap, which had somewhat startled Ferb but he was not about to object. They threw back whiskey and the woman laughed, but neither really spoke. Finally, she smiled at him and said, "My name's Vanessa."

Ferb hadn't been able to stop grinning since they'd kissed. There was something about her, this woman, that he could not place his finger on. He felt something different. He nodded slowly, then simply stated, "Ferb."

Vanessa laughed loudly. "Ferb? What kind of ridiculous name is that?" She was obviously a little tipsy.

Having had a few drinks himself, Ferb couldn't help but laugh, too. "It is a tad weird, now that I think about it."

Vanessa stopped chuckling just long enough to throw back another shot of whiskey, but she started laughing again before she actually swallowed and ended up spiting half of it out as she continued giggling.

Regardless of how ridiculous she looked at this moment, Ferb just couldn't take his eyes off of her. Not only was this girl undoubtedly more beautiful than any he'd ever seen before in his life, he could tell there was more to Vanessa than just a dancing girl in some run down bar. Though she drank like a pro and danced for money, Ferb could see a softer side. A side that was hidden, but blossomed inside her. He could feel it when she kissed him. For one thing, she hadn't been drunk, then. The kiss wasn't exaggerated, there was no tongue. It was a genuine, passionate kiss, like one would expect to receive from a wife, not some girl Ferb had just met and not even spoken to.

But, above that soft, loving side, there was fire. Hence the whiskey, hence the inclination for her to sit on his lap, hence the…no, that's it. No more hencing. It was the kind of burning desire that Ferb felt in himself. The common wildness drove both of them to be wild and free, just in slightly different ways.

"Please tell me Ferb is a nickname or something," Vanessa said through another fit of giggling. She pushed aside his unzipped jacket, trying to get a better view of what she assumed was a rock-solid chest. While she didn't discover much about his physique, she did notice the Colt revolver in its shoulder holster.

"It is. It's short for-"

Ferb was cut off when Vanessa whipped around to face the front door. She had stopped laughing and her face had sunk with dread. "Oh no," she moaned. Ferb looked past her. Through the windows he could see a black Cadillac De Ville had just parked on the curb out front. A rather hefty man was climbing from the driver's seat. When she glanced back at Ferb, she responded to his confused look with, "It's my boss."

The front doors burst open and the fat man stormed in. His angry eyes were locked on Vanessa as he stalked toward her.

Vanessa put on a fake smile. "Hey, Mr. Van Stomm," she said brightly. "How's life?"

The mountain of a man didn't answer. When he reached their table, he grabbed Vanessa by her long mane of hair and pulled her off of Ferb's lap. She crashed to the floor. He pointed a meaty finger at her. "I pay you to dance! Not to have fun with the clientele!"

Ferb had never seen anything like it. He was shocked at the supposed bar owner's actions.

_Not on my watch! _

Almost without realizing what he was doing, he opened his jacket and reached inside…

"I'll be back…" Van Stomm said, turning toward the door. "…With your _last _paycheck!"

The revolver was halfway out of Ferb's jacket when Vanessa suddenly jumped up off the floor and grabbed it away from him. She jammed it into Van Stomm's back. The big man froze when he felt the cold barrel. "I've had just about enough of you pushing me around, _Buford_!"

The other bar patrons, upon seeing the gun, scurried out the door. Ferb quickly stood and reached to take the gun from Vanessa, but she didn't give him the chance. She grinned evilly. "I think it's time for you to get yours." She pushed him forward with the gun barrel, ushering him toward the door beside the bar.

Ferb followed, hoping she wouldn't do anything too rash. He almost didn't notice that the bartender had disappeared from view.

Reaching the door, Vanessa growled, "Unlock it," under her breath.

As Van Stomm fumbled in his pocket for the keys, Ferb slowly reached to take the gun away from Vanessa again. Then he saw something out of the corner of his eye. The bartender sprang up from behind the bar, holding a large, nearly-empty bottle of gin. He raised it over his head, aiming to smash it against Vanessa's temple. With lightning reflexes, Ferb spun, grabbed the barkeep by his shirt collar, and clobbered his fist against the man's forehead. The man fell backwards, unconscious, and the bottle shattered on the floor.

Van Stomm froze in surprise, staring at his motionless employee. Vanessa prodded him with the revolver. "Door. Now." He finally extracted the key and twisted it in the lock. The door swung open into a dusty office nearly as bare as the bar. The only commodities were a coat rack, a desk, and a large safe in the rear corner.

Vanessa pushed him forward again. "Open the safe."

Nearly whimpering in fear, Buford knelt down on the floor, the gun pointed at the back of his head, and began to input the combination.

Ferb forcefully stepped forward. "What are you doing?"

"This guy has been shoving me around since he hired me. This is the last straw."

"But you're going to rob him?"

"It's not like I haven't considered it before. Besides, he takes my tips. He's been stealing from me!" The safe creaked open. She looked at him. "Now, are you going to help me-" Vanessa leaned over and briefly kissed Ferb. There was that shock, that special kiss again. "-or not?"

Ferb grinned. He supposed the life of an outlaw could be exciting. He sure got a rush knocking out the bartender. And if it meant he got to hang around this girl with the nuclear kiss, well, that would make it worth the danger. "Okay. I'm in."

"Great! Find something to tie this jerk up with. Blindfold him, too."

* * *

Vanessa, now wearing a white tank top and a pair of sunglasses of her own, tied the ends of the bag containing the cash from the safe into a loose knot. "Ready, Ferb?"

Ferb had just finished tying a handkerchief over the eyes of Buford Van Stomm, who was also bound and gagged. He gave her a thumbs up.

"You got wheels?" she asked.

"Of course."

"Sweet! Let's ride!" When they were halfway out the office door, Vanessa turned back toward her former boss. "If you're actually stupid enough to come after us, I will not hesitate to kill you," she said matter-of-factly. Then she closed the door and locked it.

They ran outside, Vanessa, still somewhat tipsy, laughing. They jumped onto Ferb's Harley and he cranked up the engine. She put her arms around his midsection to hold onto as the bike kicked up a cloud of sand and sped back onto the pavement. Ferb steered back toward the highway, heading south.

"Mexico?" she called over the wind. He nodded.

Ferb had never once considered breaking the law in any way, shape or form. He still wasn't sure exactly why he'd decided to help Vanessa. Then she tightened her grip on him and leaned her head on the back of his shoulder.

No longer were his actions a mystery. If she'd wanted help burying a body, he'd have gladly dug. There was something about this girl, and he felt something different toward her than he had any other girl.

He was pretty sure he loved her.

_Tied his hands behind him and put a blindfold on his eyes_

_If you dumb enough to chase us, man, you dumb enough to die_

**At a chapter per verse, one more chapter should finish it.**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

_We rode across the Border, down into Mexico_

_When you're runnin' from the law ain't that where everybody goes?_

And they rode. They rode for miles, eventually slipping across the border into Mexico. As the sun met the horizon, they approached a sleepy Mexican town. Ferb let the Harley idle as they coasted into the village.

Vanessa put a playful hand under Ferb's chin and leaned close to his ear. "Let's see if there's a place here we can…spend the night."

Ferb smiled and gave a nod. He spotted a little motel and steered the bike around behind the building. They climbed off and Ferb killed the motor, then hid the bike in a cluster of trees, lest someone recognize it.

Carrying the sack of cash in one hand, Ferb took Vanessa's hand with the other. It was a simple gesture, but she got the picture. He liked her.

"We're like Bonnie and Clyde, huh?" she said as they rounded the building and approached the door to the office. Ferb just smiled at her in reply. He couldn't have stopped smirking if he wanted to. She laughed. "Looks like someone's gone over the edge."

They reached the office door and Ferb reached for the knob. Vanessa suddenly grabbed his wrist. He looked at her, confused, and found she had a vicious smile on her face. "Hey," she said, "As long as we're all Bonnie and Clyde here, wanna see if we can get a room free?"

He tilted his head in consideration, wondering exactly how she planned on acquiring a room without paying. Eventually, he stepped back from the door and motioned toward it. "Go right ahead."

Vanessa chuckled again. "Such a gentleman." She grabbed the hem of the white tank top she wore and pulled the garment over her head, revealing the skimpy black bikini top she'd worn for her dancing performance. She held out the tank top to Ferb. "Hold this a sec." He took it. She pulled open the door, which jingled when she did so. "I'll be right back."

Ferb leaned against wall beside the door, peaking in the sack of loot a few times and trying to mentally calculate exactly how much cash it held without actually counting it. Eventually, he heard the tinkle of bells as Vanessa exited the office, twirling a room key on her finger. He glanced at his watch. It had only taken her eight minutes to seduce the desk clerk into giving her a free room.

"Well?" he asked, handing her back her shirt.

"'Well,' what?"

"Aren't you going to take a bow?"

She laughed as she pulled her shirt back on. Then she took a sweeping bow. Ferb couldn't resist any longer. He put an arm around her and pulled her to him, smashing his lips against hers.

She smiled at him when they broke the kiss. It wasn't the evil, mischievous smile from before. It was the smile that let the soft side show. The loving smile that showed the person Ferb desired beneath the outlaw exterior.

"Come on," she said, taking his hand. Vanessa led him to the side of the building where stairs led up to the second floor. They ascended and she led him to their room, unlocked it, and rather forcefully dragged him inside.

Locking the door, she took the sack of cash from him and tossed it on a chair. She deposited Ferb's pistol from her pocket on the bedside table and once again removed her tank top. Then she proceeded to remove Ferb's sunglasses, seeing his eyes for the first time.

They were enchanting.

Vanessa pulled off Ferb's shirt, too, and kissed him, wrapping her arms around him tightly. The kiss progressed until they finally both fell backwards onto the motel bed and they only stopped long enough to turn out the lights.

_We came to a town with a name I couldn't spell_

_She gave me what I came for in that Mexican motel…_

The next morning, Ferb awoke fitfully, vaguely aware of the noises outside. Suddenly realizing what they were, he rolled over and shook Vanessa.

She opened her eyes and smiled at him. "Good morning, Baby."

_"We have the place surrounded!" _came the voice from outside. _"Come out with your hands up! You are so busted!"_

Vanessa's smile vanished. "Damn it." They both jumped out of bed, hurriedly throwing on their scattered clothes. Vanessa grabbed the gun off the side table and Ferb snatched the money. Carefully peaking past the curtain that hung in the front window, they could see several police cars and a great many policemen, their weapons drawn and prepared to fire on anything that moved. The female, orange haired police chief was in the center, holding a megaphone.

Vanessa tore away from the window. Ferb watched her with interest, wondering what she had in mind. She stalked across the room and looked out the back window. There was a high fence along the back of the motel, so close to the building in fact that there were no cops there.

"Come on, Ferb! Out the back!" She slid open the window. He joined her by the window, but looked hesitant. He would have felt more comfortable turning himself in.

"Hey," she said, looking at his face. "We're gonna be fine." She placed a hand on his chin and tilted his head up to give him a reassuring kiss.

Once again, Ferb was sold. She climbed out the window.

Ferb followed Vanessa and found himself on a slim ledge that ran along the second floor. They edged their way carefully along for a few yards until Vanessa stopped. There was a tall tree here growing on the other side of the fence.

"We'll jump to that tree and climb down, grab the bike, and then…" Vanessa stopped when she realized she wasn't sure where to go from there. "Well, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

Bracing her right foot against the wall, Vanessa pushed off hard, her hands groping out for a hand hold as she hit the tree. Ferb's breath caught as he watched her fall a distance before finally getting purchase on a sturdy limb.

"Come on," she urged.

Ferb flung the money sack to her and then took a flying leap himself. He had slightly better luck in finding a firm landing, and they both scrambled down the tree.

They sprinted across a short expanse of vacant dust and reached the spot where they'd hidden the motorcycle. Ferb wheeled it out from the trees and Vanessa hopped on behind him.

"Let's go!" she urged. "We're home free!"

Ferb kicked the engine on and moved forward about three feet before he heard, "Freeze!"

He instinctively pulled the handbrake and stopped. They turned. A dozen police officers, including the chief, flanked them from behind, weapons at the ready.

_Every gun was on us and every heartbeat pounded_

_And there's only one thing left to do when they've got you all surrounded_

"Not another move or we'll paint the desert floor red!" the chief yelled.

Ferb and Vanessa shared a look. In the span of a millisecond, they understood each other perfectly. Ferb gunned the throttle, causing the bike to launch forward, and Vanessa pointed the Colt revolver at the cops.

Ferb heard the Colt's loud bark behind his shoulder, a sound that was accompanied very quickly by a hail of gunfire.

_She fired that old pistol, but we didn't stand a prayer_

_Money hit the gravel…bullets filled the air_

The Harley flipped. It's passengers hit the ground.

"Hold your fire!"

Ferb felt an intense pain in both his left shoulder and his side. He could feel something hot pooling beneath his clothes. He twisted around as best he could.

He could see Vanessa on the ground. There was blood pooling around her body, and the sack of money lay in it, the burlap gaining a sickly red color.

"Ferb…" she moaned as the police officers surrounded them.

He reached out with his uninjured arm, his fingers finding their way to hers. He wrapped his hand around hers, suddenly aware of how small her hand was.

One of the cops kicked the Colt away and made to handcuff Ferb. But before his hand left hers, Vanessa took a stuttered breath and managed to squeak out the words, "I…lov…ou…Ferb." And she was gone.

The police chief slapped a deputy on the back of the head. The Indian man instictivly put his hand to the spot and rubbed it. "Ow!"

"Didn't they teach you anything at the academy?" the chief barked. "When a suspect is fleeing on a vehicle, you shoot out the tires!"

"I…I panicked! She was pointing a gun at us!"

"Police officers can't be skittish! You haveta keep calm in the face of danger!"

The deputy looked down in embarrassment. "Sorry, Chief Candace."

Ferb was handcuffed to the side mirror of one of the old police cruisers while an ambulance was called. He had only suffered flesh wounds.

As he sat on the ground in the sand, Ferb thought about Vanessa. The first woman he'd ever loved. The first person he'd ever truly cared about. And now, she was gone.

He wished her boss had never showed up to the bar. They might have left without incident, and she'd still be alive.

He should have stopped her, but he didn't.

It was his fault.

For the first time in life, Ferb Fletcher cried.

_Never see it coming_

_It just hit you by surprise_

_It's that cold place in your soul_

_Or that fire in her eyes_

_That makes you come together_

_Like wild horses when they run_

_Now the cards are on the table_

_And the Bullet's in the Gun_

**Yet again, I find myself having written a story that I didn't really care for. Oh, well. I finished it anyway. I hope you enjoyed it.**


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